What happens when we use SMOG thinking?  When we are constantly saying we should do this or that?  When we feel that we should phone mum every day.  Or we ought to keep in touch with our siblings or we have got to stay friends with someone (even if that person makes us feel bad every-time we meet up.) 

How does it make you feel when you use SMOG thinking? Obligated? Tied-down? Controlled?

When we say should – what are the beliefs behind it?  What are the rules and guidelines that are governing our lives?  It’s important to stop and think about this.

Question yourself.  In what way are you choosing to use SMOG thinking in your daily life?  Where & when are you ‘shoulding’ on yourself?  Likewise in what ways are you choosing to limit yourself by this thinking?

Of course, there are times that it is perfectly relevant to choose to use these words.  For example:-

  • When there is a legal obligation it may be relevant to use the word must , i.e.“All stores must give a cooling off period of 8 days”. 
  • Or we may use the word ought to express a view that something is the right thing to do because it is morally correct or polite i.e. “you ought to say thank you upon being given a gift or compliment”. 
  • Should can be used to ask for suggestions example, “Do you recommend I do these poses myself? or should I consult with a qualified instructor?

However, I am talking about when we are ‘shoulding’ on ourselves in an unfair way.  This is when there is an implied criticism or judgement about ourselves left unsaid.  It’s where we make ourselves bad or wrong because perhaps we really want to do the opposite to that which we feel we should or ought to do.  Are we really bad or wrong?  No we are not.  We are actually all beautiful, perfect, whole and complete.

We might like to choose to use words such as “I would like to” or “I choose to” or “I will”.  With these words we feel more at choice and more in control.  We are in a position to take our power back.  These words generally tends to make us feel better about ourselves.  Choosing words that put us in a place of love rather than fear increases our self-confidence, self-reliance and self-esteem.  Remember, words have power. 

When you say should, check-in with whether it is coming from the heart or whether it is coming from an external place.  Is your SMOG thinking coming from love or fear?  If fear, then what are you afraid of?  If it is fear, what is the limiting belief behind this thought?  If it’s from a place of love then that is ok.  

If you enjoyed this content, you might like to sign up for my E-Book (It’s free) …it’s called “Limiting Belief Buster” and it’s all about busting out those limiting beliefs in a totally holistic and fun way!  Also includes 73 beautiful affirmations for inspiration.  So sign up to my newsletter to grab a copy!

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