I’m feeling really uncomfortable
Do you know why?
I spoke up for myself this morning. Speaking up for myself is something I rarely ever do. In fact, I almost NEVER do it. In the past, the ‘story’ has been that whenever I finally speak up – it back-fires on me. The ‘story’ has been that people don’t like me (and won’t be my friend anymore) when I speak up or they talk about me behind my back. Tell other people what I said – and then they also don’t ‘like’ me. Hence I usually just suck it up and keep quiet. But that’s all Story. This is Now. The Present. Because that is all we really have.
But today, was different. Somewhere deep inside I have been guided recently to speak up. And now that I write these words – I remember the words from my guidance last week at a spiritual retreat. During one particular exercise involving listening to our inner voice, I felt guided to speak up and find my voice – and I realise that I have been tested as this is EXACTLY what has happened today – I’ve not spoken up once – but TWICE this morning – hence the unease. But now that I am aware that my inner guidance has led me to speak up, I realise that everything makes sense. It was something I HAD to do. I NEEDED to do. And all of a sudden for the first time all day – I feel fine. I feel good. I spoke from my heart and I spoke from my feelings – and I’m alright to do that.
Not only that, it means that I am listening to my inner voice. My intuition. And you know what? it’s ok. All is well. Breathe in. Breathe out. Ahhhhh.
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