What to do when you feel really, really angry!

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What do you do when you feel really angry?  Like, really, really pee’d off!?  How do you cope with anger?  Especially when your trying to be a spiritual person?

Like when your angry because someone has pushed your buttons – and by the way, families are often the experts on which ones to push!  Do you end up feeling furious, outraged and frustrated?

Christmas & holidays can be especially difficult.  Families get together and old arguments and grudges can flare up.  There’s pressure to spend what you don’t have and force yourself to be having a good time – even when your not really feeling it.

It’s good to know how to stay cool and calm whenever you feel frustrated and angry. 

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 The best fighter is never angry.

 Lau Tzu 

I felt like this recently – I got really, really angry!  I knew what I needed to do to calm myself down – but my Ego didn’t want me to go there.   Instead, it wanted me to whine and complain about it – and hold onto that damn craziness!

What we need to do when we feel this type of frustration (and you’ll probably feel resistant to this)….is the very thing you won’t feel like doing!

I decided I would not allow my Ego to win! 

I sat in my meditation space, I lit candles, I meditated and I felt the stress ease away.

These are things that might work for you:

  • Walk away – even if its to excuse yourself and grab a glass of water
  • Pray
  • Meditate
  • Light a candle
  • Sit in a favorite place in your home
  • Pull angel cards for guidance
  • Simply breathe and relax
  • Practice yoga – (see my yoga postures for grounding)

You might find that you feel instantly better.  Then you will be better able to focus and listen-in to what your next steps should be.

  

 

How about you?  What do you do when you feel that red mist?  Share with me in the comments below.

 Image Credit : Unsplash

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Comments (8)

  • Avatar

    Char (@CharRichardRSW)

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    Hey Rosemarie, I completely agree with you about meditation. Since I began in 2007 it has helped me let go of so much anger. I used to road rage all the time. Now I smile in traffic. I also agreed with your other strategies. It’s helpful to have a few things to do on hand so that if one strategy doesn’t work, we can move on to another.

    Happy new year!!

    Reply

    • Avatar

      Rosemarie

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      Hey Char – thank for commenting! Yes, meditation is a wonderful, wonderful and key tool! Having a list of other strategies to fall back on means one can, as you say, move on and try something else if one tool doesn’t work.

      Reply

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    terra

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    I don’t often get really angry in one minute. Mine sort of stews for days, months, or years. Just a slow simmer that burns me up over time.

    This year, I recovered from my anger by practicing gratitude about the person I was frustrated with. Each day, I noted 5 things I was grateful for – either that person’s characteristics, or just actions they took. I recovered!

    (Then my gratitude app stopped working and the simmering began again!) Thanks for this reminder to not let anger overtake me.

    Reply

    • Avatar

      Rosemarie

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      Hi Terra – thanks for commenting. That’s great that you use gratitude as a means of diffusing anger. Having anger stew within is not good either – watch up for my upcoming post on that.(coming soon)….

      I am sorry your app stop working!…. Now, I must get me a gratitude app!

      Reply

  • Avatar

    Jacqueline Conroy

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    Thanks for that list Rosemarie – great reminder especially living with a tweenager who can press my buttons just like that!

    Reply

    • Avatar

      Rosemarie

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      Tweenager – love it! I have one to! He keeps telling me its not his fault – “it’s the hormones”!

      Reply

  • Avatar

    aprilml

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    “The best fighter is never angry. (Lau Tzu)” it took me a long long time to finally realize this, but i am a much calmer person at this stage of my life than several years ago. i love your list, rosemarie. breathing has worked best for me. long deep breaths that allow me to dispel some of the (italian) anger that has built up inside of me.

    Reply

    • Avatar

      Rosemarie

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      Great comments April. I am glad that you have found a way forward with conscious breathing.

      Reply

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